You see, it's perfect

This about broke my brain.

Why talk about the actual faire?

It is probably a sign that you have reached past the point of a lush into a determined drunk when you purchase a cup strictly for you alone to drink from. We went to Scarborough Faire today and while shopping for a birthday present for my sister (Sorry Ja', it won't arrive in time! Forgive me!!) I found this nifty little cup and decided it would be for rum/whisky/scotch. There is a random texture all around it (I'm all about texture on ceramics) and the glazing was very nicely done. The picture does not do justice to the colors. And, rather than most of the artists out there, this place was not pretentious enough to think it was worth 15-30 bucks per cup. And while it is a small gesture, the niftiest part is that there is an indentation for you to put your thumb while holding the glass. Yes, it is an ergonomic cup. And tonight, it is filled with Dalmore scotch whisky. And it is yummy.

Crafts for lazy days

"Enjoy taxidermy? Yeah, me too. This project is the sick, sick work of Instructables member canida and company. It is a real mouse, gutted and fitted with parts from one of those small laptop mice. PETA members may want to look away, or go jump off a bridge, but I'm sure the mouse died from natural causes."

I've got a few birthdays and weddings coming up I need gifts for, wonder how fast I can crank these out?

..via Gizmodo

I accomplished none of my goals thus far today

She was young, slightly overweight. Hair dyed/lightened to a dirty blonde with a bad perm, creating permanent waves that look weighed down and over-processed. A checker at Walmart, she was smart enought o be efficient and bright at her job, trained other employees to also do well, knew how to sort products by type instead of mixing the soap with the bread. Either lacking the intelligence or the drive to work elsewhere, she'll most likely continue on at this job and be promoted a few more times before trying her hand at another company or ending up with too many kids and a useless husband. The only words spoken between she and myself or the customer in line before me was the customary greetings dictated by social norms. But then, between telling me my total and giving back my chage, she just looked up at me and told me that I was 'very pretty'. It did not seem like any sort of advance or line, just an opinion from her head she felt the need to share in a way that most people never do.
--
He was an elderly black gentleman with short white hair and goatee. His brown trousers looked crisply pressed, black shoes polished so much they relflected the sun back onto his shins. He wore a brown and white sweater that looked to have been manufactured 30 years ago, a sweater like Cosby would wear back when we would watch his show every night before dinner.
He carried a rolled up canvas bag with indecipherable writing across one side. On his head was a powder blue baseball cap that contrasted the rest of the image quite severly. And he walked along the sidewalk as I sat at the light, and he kept lifting his left arm as if to gesture or show his point as he quite audibly argued with himself. Or perhaps with another person that was just not currently present.
--
He was tall and blonde with dreads mixed into his hair, a large hat on his head. Less rasta/stoner, more the type that normally works at a comic book store. But, with just enough style and cool points he can work at Starbucks instead.
--
She was incredibly bored, holding her clipboard sideways as she leaned against the railing instead of trying to engage in conversations with passer-bys to try to gain research for whater company she worked for.
--
For someone who dislikes people as much as I do, I find myself watching their movements rather intensely. And shut it about Walmart. Find me somewhere else that sells unbuttered popcorn 6 bags for 2 dollars and I'll buy there.

Facing the Facts

Psychoanalytical account of neurosis

As an illness, neurosis represents a variety of psychiatric conditions in which emotional distress or unconscious conflict is expressed through various physical, physiological, and mental disturbances, which may include physical symptoms (e.g., hysteria). The definitive symptom is anxieties. Neurotic tendencies are common and may manifest themselves as depression, acute or chronic anxiety, obsessive-compulsive tendencies, phobias, and even personality disorders, such as borderline personality disorder or obsessive-compulsive personality disorder. It has perhaps been most simply defined as a "poor ability to adapt to one's environment, an inability to change one's life patterns, and the inability to develop a richer, more complex, more satisfying personality." [1] Neurosis should not be mistaken for psychosis, which refers to more severe disorders.

The term connotes an actual disorder or disease, but under its general definition, neurosis is a normal human experience, part of the human condition. Most people are affected by neurosis in some form. A psychological problem develops when neuroses begin to interfere with, but not significantly impair, normal functioning, and thus cause the individual anxiety. Frequently, the coping mechanisms enlisted to help "ward off" the anxiety only exacerbate the situation, causing more distress. It has even been defined in terms of this coping strategy, as a "symbolic behavior in defense against excessive psychobiologic pain [which] is self-perpetuating because symbolic satisfactions cannot fulfill real needs."

So tonight I couldn't stop myself from cleaning things at work. It started with Rebecca's phone, was followed by Nick's and a spare, then cleaning my desk. Rubbing alcohol should be a mandatory product kept by each person working in an office. But I think i might have gone a bit overboard and a bit on the OCD side when I popped off all my keys from the keyboard and cleaned each one and under them. Sure I had work to do, but who can work in a place that is grungy and disgusting? (disgustimapated? I don't remember the other word)

Turns out, everyone but me can deal with this. When I worked at Starbucks, I was so obsessed with making things clean i used to get down on my hands and knees and clean the floor with a deck brush, drains were immaculate, bathrooms pristine, etc. The only thing that kept me from taking apart the pipes and cleaning the inside was I couldn't figure out how to keep the store open and still have water. Way back in the day, Brendan and I would have cleaning parties at the store, where we would gather a few people to come up after work and attack the place from ceiling to floor and clean everything we could. All without pay, just so as to suprise out boss when she came in the next day and saw everything shiny.

Yet somehow, in the place I spend most of my time, I can't seem to make myself finish laundry or clean the bathroom. I want to devote such care to it that unless I have about a good 5 hours, I can't bring myself to clean even just the top floor of the apartment.

And it is the contrast that really bothers me. Like tonight I know that if I hadn't been running areas and it was slow enough, I would have started to clean other people's phones and keyboards, anything that looked really gross. Not that they would notice, but it would make me feel better. The only thing stopping me was the necessity of keeping my job and the overwhelming desire to go home and drink,

Which, as always, wins out over all cleaning or other disorders. Yay alcoholism!

Food for Thought

"Thinking is not an automatic function, In any hour and issue of his life, man is free to think or avoid that effort....He is free to make the wrong choice, but not free to succeed with it. He is free to evade reality, he is free to unfocus his mind and stumble blindly down any road he pleases, but not free ti avoid the abyss he refuses to see....Man's basic vice, the source of all his evils, is the act of unfocusing his mind, the suspension of his conscoiuness, which is not blindness, but the refusal to see, not ignorance, but the refusal to know....Just as a man is free to attmept to survive by any random means, as a parasite, a moocher or a looter, but not free to succeed at it beyond the range of the moment-so is he free to seek his happiness in any irrational fraud, any whim, any delusion, any mindless escape from reality, but not free to succeed at it beyond the range of the moment nor to escape the consequences."

- Ayn Rand, The virtue of Selfishness

Creativity with Smoke

Smoke photography by Mehmet Ozgur. More available here

Something had better be chasing me for the same

Woman runs entire length of Long Island.

And yet Boris the Blade complains if we make him drive 15 miles. This tells me we need to start hiring Polish immigrants, not just Russians.

Ikea on crack

Because it must be awful to live in a space larger than a dorm room that is actually full of light and modern design/furniture/architecture. Austria's Justizzentrum Loeben Jailhouse

Another reason to hate diamonds

When opulence equals ridiculous. Diva Vodka is one of the most expensive liquors ever bottled, more from the packaging than the liquid. "The Scotland based company Blackwood Distillers is producing the triple distilled Diva vodka. Through a sophisticate process, it gets ice-filtered, filtered through Nordic birch charcoal to purify then passed through a sand of crushed diamonds and gems. But what is really outstanding is the product’s price. In every single bottle you’ll find semi-precious or precious stones, including diamonds, which will make the product price range from US$ 70.00 (£35) up to astonishing US$ 1,060,000.00 (£540,000)"

..via Knuttz

This is Cake Town!!!

Brand Simple

Top 15 trusted brands of consumers aged 21-27

Apple
Trader Joe's
Jet Blue
In-N-Out Burger
Ben & Jerry's
Whole Foods
Adidas
American Apparel
Target
H & M clothing stores
Levi's
Volkswagen
Converse
Vitamin Water
Red Stripe Jamaican beer

Yeah, I can't say I disagree. If I lived where Trader Joe's or H&M were around, I would probably love them as long as I didn't work for Fujitsu. Not sure what In-N-Out Burger is, but I know if they hadn't changed the model of the VW Jetta I'd be driving one now instead of a Scion. And I do love me some Whole Foods/Target shopping. And Apple goes without saying.

..via The Consumerist

Shame we can't all react this way

Darwinism in Motion

Mursi Tribeswoman

..via Cult of Mac

Technology has gone too far

Of all the stupid things ot make money from. Emotive's new Push Ringer technology will override your cell's preset ringtone with whatever the person calling you chooses, including music, video, avatars and flash files. So the next time you call your boss when he's in the middle of a meeting with stockbrokers, his phone can start playing assomething wildly innapproriate that I am too lazy to think of an example for at this time. Feel free to post examples for me.

It's this. This is why my phone is always on vibrate. This and every other stupud little "entertaining" thing that can be set for a phone that is in reality ridiculously stupid and annoying.

Tiny Bringers of Death

Soldiers From Wire

A Century of Change

Predictions of the Year 2000
from The Ladies Home Journal of December 1900

Prediction #1: There will probably be from 350,000,000 to 500,000,000 people in America and its possessions by the lapse of another century. Nicaragua will ask for admission to our Union after the completion of the great canal. Mexico will be next. Europe, seeking more territory to the south of us, will cause many of the South and Central American republics to be voted into the Union by their own people.”

Prediction #3: Gymnastics will begin in the nursery, where toys and games will be designed to strengthen the muscles. Exercise will be compulsory in the schools. Every school, college and community will have a complete gymnasium. All cities will have public gymnasiums. A man or woman unable to walk ten miles at a stretch will be regarded as a weakling.

Prediction #4: There Will Be No Street Cars in Our Large Cities. All hurry traffic will be below or high above ground when brought within city limits. In most cities it will be confined to broad subways or tunnels, well lighted and well ventilated, or to high trestles with “moving-sidewalk” stairways leading to the top. These underground or overhead streets will teem with capacious automobile passenger coaches and freight with cushioned wheels. Subways or trestles will be reserved for express trains. Cities, therefore, will be free from all noises.

Prediction #16: There will be No C, X or Q in our every-day alphabet. They will be abandoned because unnecessary. Spelling by sound will have been adopted, first by the newspapers. English will be a language of condensed words expressing condensed ideas, and will be more extensively spoken than any other. Russian will rank second.

Prediction #22: Store Purchases by Tube. Pneumatic tubes, instead of store wagons, will deliver packages and bundles. These tubes will collect, deliver and transport mail over certain distances, perhaps for hundreds of miles. They will at first connect with the private houses of the wealthy; then with all homes. Great business establishments will extend them to stations, similar to our branch post-offices of today, whence fast automobile vehicles will distribute purchases from house to house.

--
Some of the others have come true in a form or fashion. Interesting to read.

..via Digg

Only Mildly Harmful

For when you want to ever embrace your whiteness

WWFTD: After-Dream

"I looked upon the scene before me - upon the mere house, and the simple landscape features of the domain - upon the bleak walls - upon the vacant eye-like windows - upon a few rank sedges - and upon a few white trunks of decayed trees - with an utter depression of soul which I can compare to no earthly sensation more properly than to the after-dream of the reveller upon opium - the bitter lapse into everyday life - the hideous dropping off of the veil."

- Edgar A. Poe, The Fall of the House of Usher (1839)

I'm Thinking Wedding Present....

I found this beautiful faux marble peeing drink dispenser at a shop in Odaiba. I thought the Godzilla beer dispenser was awesome, but this one's a pretty good contender. I mean, it's a peeing statuesque little boy, peeing whatever you want to drink. Great for people who have that what's-it-called fetish where you like to pee on people. I think in Japan it's called SUKATORO. The heart sticker is a nice touch.

..via Tokyo Mango

Start the day with a game of tag!

Clocky: The alarm clock that runs away and hides when you don't wake up. Clocky gives you one chance to get up. But if you snooze, Clocky will jump off of your nightstand and wheel around your room looking for a place to hide. Clocky is kind of like a misbehaving pet, only he will get up at the right time.

Because morning isn't obnoxious enough on it's own. I like that you can pay the $50 for it and disable the wheels if you want, totally eliminating the purpose.

I need to get my drink on

I hate Will Ferrell. But this made me laugh. Thanks to Heather.

Two for Titus

Sam Weber Portfolio . full of fairy tales and darkness.

To keep in mind

Well, I could always take this approach to making my arm not hurt. Veternarian has arm bit ofo by 440 pound crocodile while trying to remove tranquilizer darts.

To complete a color wheel of ugly

Ah, Britain. You bring such wonderful things, such as H&M clothing, Bob Crowley, and traditional stoicism. Thanks so much now for your garish contraption that emulates Pepto on some sickening discovery of being a girl, full of hopes and dreams (depicted by the stars and swirls). Now, for the cost of $27 plus s&h, I too can be continuously nauseated by the bubble gum reminisce under my fingers. Admittedly I do enjoy some pink-colored things. But to be fair, I do not discriminate enough to say I hate any certain color, but rather prefer the spectrum. On that note, however, there are some things that work as pink and some that don't. This, expectedly, was a miss.

Also, I am wondering how much use the mirror is. You can lean over to see yourself and block all the light, or it can be used as a preliminary defense for when the sky is falling. With this keyboard, you'll be the first to know.

And all we got were Transformers and He-Man when we were kids

'"The “I Am Freedom” figure showcases a jean-clad Jesus aboard a Chopper, complete with long raked handlebars, his long robe flying out from behind him. The “I Am Victory” model has Jesus mid-bicycle kick in a soccer uniform, his cleats pointing skyward. In a more thoughtful vein, “I Am Peace” shows Jesus in camouflage military fatigues, holding a dove in his outstretched hand, while “I Am Hope” simply portrays Jesus in shabby clothing, holding a sign with the all-too omnipresent, “Will Work 4 Food.”

...Rounding out the set are “I Am Strength,” with Jesus aboard a bucking bull, cowboy hat in hand; “I Am Faith,” featuring Jesus scrambling with a football; “I Am Spirit” has Him shooting a curl while surfing; “I Am Youth” has a skateboarding Jesus riding a rail; and lastly “I Am Life” shows a rock-climbing Jesus hanging from a cliff.'

New Jesus Action Figures to be released soon. On a side note, am I the only one who think these look deceptively like the Burger King?

..via Fark

Disconnect

Geek Culture

How much better can you get than trying to be an apple? The picture above that one looks like a slightly messier version of our entire IT department.

Deconstructing a Twinkie

"For example, 14 of the most common chemicals we use are found in Twinkies. I mention the Twinkie-Industrial Complex. It's tied in with major industries that are also often tied with government policy. This isn't mere food," he says. "This is industry."

Red Light Equality

Starting Sunday, any Dallas police officer in a marked squad car who is captured on the city's cameras running a red light will have to pay the $75 fine if the incident doesn't comply with state law.

I like that the article blurb from Slashdot says "Is this a case for or against governments relying on un-biased automated systems? Or, should anyone be able to control who is recorded on camera and who is held accountable?" and has tags for the entry marked as haha, pigs, abovethelaw, bacon, politics

Fetish Galore

"When I asked him: 'What are you doing there?', he fell off the back of the goat, so I captured and tied him up."

'Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit.'

Back in middle school I had a friend that when I spent the night over at her house, inevitably we would go to church in the morning. Not just the normal Methodist/Presbyterian boredom I was used to, but instead it was the wacky, completely different world of Mormons. Sunday school had sections where it was split by gender, they cross their arms to pray and it was an all-day affair. Or so it felt. But I remember in one of the Young Life classes a conversation about the word 'fool'.

I was always brought up with the word 'fool' meaning as a clown, typically Shakespearean. In this class, I discovered, the people were taught that calling someone a fool was a method of damning them to hell. It seemed a bit contrary to other standard Christian beliefs, but then I reminded myself, these were Mormons, not just the typical Prodestants. I was confused and bewildered, but of all the things I remember about those days, I learned the ease of damning someone to hell.

So on that note. I find today yet another easy method to condemn everone you dislike. You Are Damned. Add whoever you like, for whatever reason you see fit. Some other examples already on the site include Barbragetz, for underpaying her employees; The Batting Machine at Putt Putt, for throwing like a girl; Your Mom, for being a whore; and possibly the greatest, Ninja', for 'Oh Wait, Ninja's are too Cool, Nevermind'. 35559 already damned (although many look like repeats). Go add a few!

If Only

Through the Looking-Glass

In Hindu Philosophy, life is cyclical. The universe has always been and will always be. Publius Terentius Afer (Terence) once stated that "There is nothing new under the sun." Lately that feeling has been coming in waves at me. I ran into old friends today when back somewhat towards my old area. It was nice to see faces I had assumed would always be seen only in old photos ever again. Another friend of mine has been speaking to an old co-worker and bringing back a billion associations in a different form. It's like all of my old life is trying to invade again. Or, on the other side, that I'm being told to remember who I was and where I came from. I'm not sure which.

Perhaps, like Dorian Gray, I am actually staying exactly the same and there is another me that is changing.

This is where all of the normal and the extra blend together. Coincidence, deja vu, etc. all seem to combine into a different world that I haven't seen in a long time, if ever before. Maybe I'm just looking at a giant snow-globe of my life rather than actually living it, but my perception sees it differently. And, as a boss of mine likes to say, "Perception is Reality".

Another Loss in the Literary World

"Life happens too fast for you ever to think about it. If you could just persuade people of this, but they insist on amassing information."

Kurt Vonnegut, 1922-2007

Wii!

New Mac Ad!

But mine will be used to make drinks!

Sydney based artist, Brian Walker, credits his desire to seamlessly fuse fashion, illustration and the element of surprise as the driving creative force behind his artworks.

In a time where the line between hyper-realities and those of our own is becoming finer, the Sydney artist's work speaks a relative language. The digital artist is inspired by surreal landscapes, the evolution of fashion and changing popular culture . Walker takes these inspirational genres and merges them with his concept of 'using photography as a tool to represent the ideas of the impossible'.

Noting David La Chapelle as a major influence, Walker strives to create a hyper-real visual language which at first glance appears real, and at second, evolves into the surreal. More of the Sydney artists work can be seen at lickthesun.com

Also, the picture to the left is a rather accurate representation of what range of function I will still have once my broken bits are replaced with robo-arms.

..via The Cool Hunter

By a guy with the name Ballhatchet

Hamster Powered Paper Shredder

Finally, design and function. Almost convincing enough for me to have something living in my house. Almost.

Paychecks = Booze

Prison vs Work

Emotastic!

"I don't like parties where everyone has fun. I don't want to dance and be cheerful, I'd much rather sit in a corner and mope as it's what I'm good at".

Just when it seems like emo hasn't invaded culture enough, the popularization of "crying clubs" allows people to join together, show their goth side, and cry in public. Sometimes, even with the help of onions to start a person off. This is about the time someone needs to walk in, slap each person across the face and tell them to grow a pair and man up. Or, at least, quit acting like a sissy.

After all, with enough booze, most of these people would get to this point of self-realization where crying would be induced. This is just condoning it, something that should not be rewarded with profit.

Eternal Flowers

"Botanical garden created by the British artist Marc Quinn. Quinn has eternally preserved nearly 1,000 flowers in full bloom by immersing them in 25 tons of liquid silcone at -80˚ Celsius. ”I wanted to make a beautiful environment,” says Quinn, “but there is also something sinister about a beauty that doesn’t decay. Like The Portrait of Dorian Gray, it implies decay somewhere else, and here somewhere else is the viewer.”




Personally, I just really like the colors. Found over at Xenmate

100 Suns

"Between 1945 and 1992 the United States detonated 1,149 nuclear test explosions. Until 1962 the tests were conducted in the atmosphere and oceans. 106 f the 216 above-ground blasts were exploded 63 miles from Las Vegas, Nevada. The remaining were detonated at the Enewetak or Bikini Atolls in the Pacific Ocean. The immediate and lasting consequences of these tests were unforeseen."

Michael Light's Atomic Explosion Photographs

Hmm...

It's always a curious thing to be browsing through a random blog and find a picture of something that you've seen so often that it is taken for granted as a standard piece of the landscape. This was found on Xenmate, and taken by Bijou, a woman from New York. Just goes to show how even if it isn't something special to you, to someone from out of town even the old Carrollton tower-turned-rock-climbing-gym can be considered something picture-worthy.

Happy Easter

Will This Do?

Link Dump

So tonight has been divided between baking deserts for tomorrow's family dinner, cooking lasagna and supplemental foods for the seven people over for game and spending much too many hours online reading news and the like. So rather than a few different entries, everything goes all together, feel free to pick and choose.

And yes, I did manage to burn half the cookies. The lasagna was great, but not like I did anything but put it in the oven. The brownies are still in the oven, and I did work quite hard at stirring the mix with my broken wrist.

Tale of a 13 Year Old Prostitute: Bias Against Being a US Citizen

Fundamentalist Secularists and the Religion of Atheism

My Brief Career As A Phone-sex Worker Doesn't pay off it seems

Ten Things Your Boss Hates About You

Pink Floyd the same without Roger Waters

New York Auto Show Preview

Laura Miller Should DIAF.... Noble cause, stupid, stupid woman copycat instead of thinking for herself..

What Religion Should You Be? Stupid quiz to decide if you lakcing the ability to think...Somehow I'm torn directly between Atheism and Agnoticism. Same damn score....

Not Quite UK Style Yet

New Hampshire overwhelmingly votes to to reject federal Real ID Act

Like killing lightning bugs and smearing them on fabric

LumiGram, for all your decorating/clothing needs. Luminescent fabric used in clothing, bags, etc. Ridiculously expensive as the technology is still new, and the design (especially for clothing) needs some help. But imagine the ambience of a dinner party set at a table with a glowing tablecloth.

..via Designspotter

Imagine the Children..

A wedding cake for when you really need to show your nerdy side.

All but the toppers is either cake or icing, including the piranha plants. Pretty well done.

...via Tokyo Mango

Office Death

Kill Yourself in Five Minutes or Less

No, not a how-to guide. If you need a guide to pull off a short suicide in real life, you're not being creative enough. This, however, is an awesome little game with the aim of finally finishing yourself off at work with only the use of common office equipment and abuse of coworkers. The controls are a little annoying, but it is terribly satisfying to stab yourself in the chest with a pair of scissors or have the microwave explode on you.

Housing go down the hole!

330 ft deep sinkhole in Guatemala

I'll Have to Escape Blindfolded!

Top 15 Unintentionally Funny Comic Book Panels

"Thank god our use of language changes over the years because it makes our old comics look stupid and that's funny."

..via Fazed

RIAA attacking NIN

According to Billboard.com, the RIAA sent cease-and-desist emails to web sites that posted the tracks, leading one industry source to say, "These f***ing idiots are going after a campaign that the label signed off on."

I love when organizations like the RIAA stick their heads so far up their butts they can't bother with logic. Because, of course, it makes perfectly logical sense to go after Nine Inch Nails for leaking its own music.

Wine Gadgetness

This is just cute. Not sure something like this should ever be near be due to my violent streaks, but this is fancy.

Precisely

"If [alcohol] sloweth age, it strengtheneth youth, it helpeth digestion, it abandoneth melancholie, it relisheth the heart, it lighteneth the mind, it quickeneth the spirits, it keepeth and preserveth the head from whirling, the eyes from dazzling, the tongue from lisping, the mouth from snaffling, the teeth from chattering, and the throat from rattling; it keepeth the stomach from wambling, the heart from swelling, the hands from shivering, the sinews from shrinking, the veins from crumbling, the bones from aching, and the marrow from soaking." — Anonymous, 13th century, quoted in The Great Quotations, George Seldes, 1983

Clap your hands and she might come back to life

Did Faeries live at the bottom of your garden?


Follow up 04/03: It was a hoax

In case your eyes and brain didn't come up with that on it's own....