So perhaps it is the combination of the annoying debacle of the dress from China for the wedding, the desire to feel physically different from the draining two weeks I spent holed up in my apartment writing reviews every evening without change, or the freedom that was involved in the daily required walking in Seattle, but I have had constant cravings to exercise in the last few weeks back in Dallas. I have been running consistently for a year, but the last few weeks have made me desire to hit the trails or the gym every day, and feel frustration when I have not been able.
Not to say that the time I have spent in other activities has not been enjoyable. The friends I have seen, the simple act of cooking, sleeping in, etc. have been remarkable. But I hate the feeling when my body requires me to give up. When the muscles ache at night, when I cannot run another step without my lungs exploding or do one more repetition without shaking arms that drop the weight.
I sit here tonight, exhausted, addicted, wanting to do more, prove myself to me, and really, hating the healing time of the body most. Setting goals and seeing results is a driving force, but mostly, I need reminders that not everything can be done at once, that everything takes time.